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Why wont you change?



      
Asking someone to change is a big ask.  Especially when you have only known the person for like a couple of months.  That is exactly what Laura is asking a 300-year-old vampire to do.  Asking someone to change overnight is an impossible task.  Change takes time and there has to be a want to change.  Now that Carmilla has gone from the evil side to the good side she has struggled with this new identity.  Laura really doesn't understand this yet and just expects Carmilla to be who she was at the end of season one and that isn't who Carmilla is at the moment.   

         Laura "So … yeah.  I think …. Carm and I just … broke up.  And … Was I not supposed to want her to be better?  Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do?  I mean, it - it’s supposed to go … you love someone and - I’m not even saying that I loved her because we were only together for, like, a month, and that would be crazy, but … if I did … wasn’t she supposed to try and be better?  I mean … the story goes: you fall in love with a monster, and then they stop being all monstery!  They redeem themselves, right?  The story isn’t just …. fall in love with a monster.  That would be a stupid story.  I don’t wanna be a part of that stupid story."  Don't get me wrong Carmilla is not in the wrong she changed for Laura but was hoping Laura would change for her too but was unwilling.  

    Remember that look? (That Look) Back at the end of season one.  The one after Laura says "You know."  Carmilla had that feeling of someone who loves me for me.  It's why she made the sacrifice in the first place.  It makes the breakup so hard on Carmilla probably more so than Laura.  She did change for Laura and for Laura to say it wasn't good enough has to be so hard.  She thought Luara loved her despite her past only to want more.  That makes that moment on the couch even more painful.   

        I never thought that I would swing back to Laura, but I did at this point.  When she was upset that Carmilla wouldn't change for her.  There I stood starring right back at a scenario I was in early with L.  L liked to go out and party to release stress, however, I never ever wanted anyone to take it too far.  I wasn't ever mad at going out it was the levels into which she was getting drunk.  I drew the line well before passing out and not remembering much from the last night.  That was not ok with me so I completely see where Laura is coming from. However L and I did meet in the middle she drank less and I drank a little more it was a compromise and it worked out for both of us.  I became less of a stick in the mud and she could enjoy our time out with each other.   

        Did I want L to be better? Yes, of course, we all want our partners to be the best version of themselves.  I couldn't ask her to change in a day it took about a year for both of us to change.  So we compromised for the betterment of both of us and our relationship. Eventually, both Laura and Carmilla will have to compromise to fix the relationship if they want to be together. Laura needs to sometimes put Carmilla ahead of the greater good and Carmilla needs to maybe scale back the violence.  It's something I can see both compromising on.

     

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